♪ Friends say it's fine ♪
♪ Friends say it's good ♪
♪ Everybody says it's just like rock n roll ♪
♪ Well, it's plain to see you were meant for me ♪
♪ I'm your boy ♪ ♪ Your 20th century toy... ♪
Ladies and gentlemen, she puts the B in beautiful.
She's my date for tonight. Make some noise for the gorgeous Mel B!
Welcome to Lip Sync Battle UK.
The game is simple. Two stars lip-sync two songs
and the audience decide who did it best.
Now, the mics may be off, but the battle is definitely on.
- Are you ready? - Yes!
And here to help me, as always, is my partner in rhyme.
Give it up for Professor Green!
- What's happening? - How have you been today?
Good as gold. I get it!
Anyway, tonight's stars are multi-award-winners.
And they're battling to get their hands on the most coveted prize in showbiz...
this. Our Lip Sync Battle championship belt.
Yes. But first up,
he's a funnyman, a gameshow host,
a classically trained singer.
But none of that's going to help him tonight. It's Alexander Armstrong!
Next up is a comedian famed for his dark humour
and deadpan delivery.
8 Out Of 10 Cats love him.
Give it up for Jimmy Carr!
- You are ready for action, aren't ya? - Whoa!
- Huge! - How are you both feeling about tonight?
I feel like I've just come from the office. Look at this!
You're a singer. Do you think that gives you an advantage or not, or what?
No, not even slightly.
- Who do you think's gonna win? - Me.
I think you might win.
You were in the Spice Girls. You're gonna kill this.
- There you go. - There's Pro Green as well.
I was going to ask you, Pro Green...
what are you expecting from these two lovely lads?
Way too much of a conundrum. Pointless asking me, darling.
A few of you getting those jokes.
He's already got his bloody rap hands out.
I decided who goes first, so I went for the man with the best laugh.
Obviously, that's you, Jimmy.
So, Alexander, you go and take a seat in our bar.
- Let me have a quick chat to you. - Sure.
How are you feeling about being the first to take to the stage?
I just, um... Obviously... I mean, I know it's a cliché
to talk about tragic back stories, but...
I don't want to make the crowd... But my grandmother...
She's... she just...
She fucking hates this show.
I really want to do well just to stick it to her.
- OK. So what song will you be lip-syncing? - You'll see.
All right, well...
He's first up and I don't know what he's singing,
but it's Jimmy. Take it away, my lovely.
Oh... I need my mic.
♪ If you had one shot ♪
♪ Or one opportunity ♪
♪ To seize everything you ever wanted ♪
♪ In one moment ♪
♪ Would you capture it ♪
♪ Or just let it slip? ♪
♪ Yo ♪
♪ His palms are sweaty, knees weak ♪ ♪ Arms are heavy ♪
♪ There's vomit on his sweater already ♪
♪ Mom's spaghetti ♪
♪ He's nervous, but on the surface he looks calm and ready to drop bombs ♪
♪ But he keeps on forgetting what he wrote down ♪
♪ The whole crowd goes so loud ♪
♪ He opens his mouth ♪ ♪ But the words won't come out ♪
♪ He's choking how ♪ ♪ Everybody's joking now ♪
♪ The clock's run out ♪ ♪ Time's up ♪
♪ Over, blaow! ♪
♪ Snap back to reality ♪ ♪ Oh, there goes gravity ♪
♪ Oh, there goes Rabbit ♪ ♪ He choked ♪
♪ He's so mad, but he won't give up that easy ♪
♪ No, he won't have it ♪
♪ He knows his whole back's to these ropes ♪
♪ It don't matter, he's dope ♪ ♪ He knows that, but he's broke ♪
♪ He's so sad that he knows ♪ ♪ When he goes back to his mobile home ♪
♪ That's when it's back to the lab again, yo ♪
♪ This whole rhapsody ♪
♪ He better go capture this moment ♪ ♪ And hope it don't pass him ♪
♪ You better lose yourself in the music, the moment ♪
♪ You own it ♪ ♪ You better never let it go ♪
♪ You only get one shot ♪ ♪ Do not miss your chance to blow ♪
♪ This opportunity comes once in a lifetime, yo ♪
♪ You better lose yourself in the music, the moment ♪
♪ You own it ♪ ♪You better never let it go ♪
♪ You only get one shot ♪ ♪ Do not miss your chance to blow ♪
♪ This opportunity comes once in a lifetime ♪
♪ You better... ♪
And boom! Ended with the classic mic drop!
So, have you always been a bit of an Eminem fan?
I've not heard of him.
They told me it was Elvis!
You really got into the zone. You were like a bit of a bad boy.
I saw a different side of you.
- Stop it, you! - Kinda liked it.
Listen, you're a woman with needs. I understand that, but please!
Alexander, what did you think?
I'm a bit worried. That is so like what I'm about to do.
- How are you going to top it, though? - Well, easily. Easily.
Easily?
- Sure! - I have no...
I think he's got this.
Pro, as a fellow rapper yourself,
are you a little bit worried about what you've just seen?
Slightly, but for completely different reasons.
- Jimmy, go to the bar and get yourself a drink. - Lovely.
Come on over, Alexander, you're up.
So, Alexander, what song have you chosen?
Scissor Sisters.
Wooo!
All right, then.
I Don't Feel Like Dancing. I mean, I do, but...
OK, well, hit him back with I Don't Feel Like Dancing.
It's Alexander. Go for it!
♪ Wake up in the morning with a head like "What ya done?" ♪
♪ This used to be the life but I don't need another one ♪
♪ Good luck cuttin' nothin' ♪ ♪ Carryin' on, ♪
♪ You wear them gowns ♪
♪ So how come I feel so lonely when you're up gettin' down? ♪
♪ So I play along when I hear that favourite song ♪
♪ I'm gonna be the one who gets it right ♪
♪ You better know when you're swingin' round the room ♪
♪ Looks like magic's solely yours tonight ♪
♪ But I don't feel like dancin' ♪ ♪ When the old Joanna plays ♪
♪ My heart could take a chance ♪ ♪ But my two feet can't find a way ♪
♪ You think that I could muster up a little soft shoe gentle sway ♪
♪ But I don't feel like dancin' ♪ ♪ No sir, no dancin' today ♪
♪ Don't feel like dancin', dancin' ♪
♪ Why'd you pick a tune when I'm not in the mood? ♪
♪ Don't feel like dancin', dancin' ♪
♪ Even if I don't find nothin' better to do ♪
♪ Don't feel like dancin', dancin' ♪
♪ I'd rather be home with the one in the bed till dawn, with you. ♪
- Alexander! - Yes.
Well, I see you felt very comfortable doing that song.
- You think? - Yeah.
I'm just a bit confused with what happened over there.
I'm talking about the nether area. What happened there?
I thought that was very special, that.
It was!
So, heading on into round two, do you think you've got the edge?
You know, I'm not even going to Simon Cowell it. You are through to boot camp.
Pro, what did you make of Alexander?
I was going to say it was quite smooth up until that part.
Then it looked like the sort of thing people get kicked out of clubs for.
All right, well, you know what?
It's time for a break now, but do not go anywhere,
as both of our comedians will be hoping the have the last laugh
as they pull out all the stops to get their hands on that belt
in round two of tonight's Lip Sync Battle UK!
Welcome back to Lip Sync Battle UK.
Now, so far tonight, Alexander DID make us feel like dancing.
And we were lost in Jimmy's performance.
Time for round two, where our stars up their game
and do whatever it takes to get their hands on the ultimate prize -
the Lip Sync Battle championship belt.
But first to take to the stage is Jimmy.
And this is how he got into character for his showdown.
Are we doing trash-talking?
Your mother has a penis!
Fun fact about Alexander Armstrong...
he's released two albums of his own music.
And now he's lip-syncing. So I guess he got the message.
I'm in my forties now.
When I arrived here, I saw Alexander and thought,
"Do you know what? I'm the young gun in this."
Your first song is a Barry Manilow song, right?
That's why he's wearing that.
It's great to see Alexander Armstrong back where he belongs... on TV.
But in the evenings, not during the day.
I don't want to trash-talk Xander.
It's lovely that someone's dad's getting a go.
Whoa!
I'm a little bit competitive.
I would be annoyed if I thought Alexander was getting paid more than me.
Me, me, me, ma, ma, ma...
If I was trying to sum up Alexander Armstrong in three words, I would say,
"The other one".
Always the other one. He's wasn't Ben Miller. He's not Richard Osman.
Didn't realise I had flabby arms. Need to go to the gym.
It's OK if I do that for the whole show.
Why should he be scared of me? I've got his wife and family.
It's going to be quite annoyingly good-natured.
Good news, Alexander. If you've come as a cunt, you've won.
♪ Muh muh muh muh muh ♪
♪ I wanna hold 'em like they do in Texas plays ♪
♪ Fold 'em, let 'em hit me ♪ ♪ Raise it, baby stay with me ♪
♪ I love it ♪ ♪ Love game intuition ♪
♪ Play the cards with spades to start ♪
♪ And after he's been hooked I'll play the one that's on his heart ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ ♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh oh ♪
♪ I'll get him hot ♪ ♪ Show him what I've got ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh oh ♪
♪ I'll get him hot ♪ ♪ Show him what I've got ♪
♪ Can't read my ♪ ♪ Can't read my ♪
♪ No, he can't read my poker face ♪
♪ She's got me like nobody ♪
♪ Can't read my ♪ ♪ Can't read my ♪
♪ No, he can't read my poker face ♪
♪ She's got me like nobody ♪
♪ My, my, my poker face ♪
♪ P-P-P-Poker face ♪
♪ Muh muh muh muh muh ♪ ♪ P-P-P-Poker face P-P-P-Poker face ♪
♪ Muh muh muh muh muh ♪
♪ I wanna roll with him ♪ ♪ A hard pair we will be ♪
♪ A little gambling is fun when you're with me ♪
♪ I love it ♪
♪ Russian roulette is not the same without a gun ♪
♪ And baby, when it's love if it's not rough, it isn't fun, fun ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ ♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh oh ♪
♪ I'll get him hot ♪ ♪ Show him what I've got ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ ♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh oh ♪
♪ I'll get him hot ♪ ♪ Show him what I've got ♪
♪ Can't read my ♪ ♪ Can't read my ♪
♪ No, he can't read my poker face ♪
♪ She's got me like nobody ♪
♪ Can't read my ♪ ♪ Can't read my ♪
♪ No, he can't read my poker face ♪
♪ She's got me like nobody. ♪
My, oh, my!
You definitely maintained the poker face throughout the whole of that.
- How did that feel? - Awesome.
It was like coming home to me.
Honestly, I enjoyed that just a little bit too much!
A worrying amount.
The most fun ever.
Alexander, what was it like watching Jimmy?
- Worried now? - That was beautiful.
It was. Well done, you.
Beautiful is the only word.
Are you confident you could beat that?
Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's a really weird sensation.
I can feel Pro Green undressing me with his eyes.
You go off to the VIP bar.
Come on down here, Alexander.
- So you've seen what you've got to beat. - Yeah.
But you've been feeling pretty confident about your performance,
so let's take a look, shall we?
Here we are. Can't wait to go.
Alan Carr doesn't stand a chance.
I don't even know how he can say "lip-sync",
let alone do it. I think it's gonna be a tooth-off.
Ooh! It's time for some lip-syncing! Hello!
- It's Alexander Armstrong. Can't believe you're... - Nice to see you.
- What are you doing here? - Lip Sync Battle.
- Yeah. - No!
- Yes. - No!
It's JIMMY Carr. It's not Alan Carr.
See, I AM worried now.
I keep picturing him with a hairbrush
in his room, rehearsing.
I dread to think the profanity that is coming out.
Bad-mouthing me.
He is an old man. He was wearing three different kinds
of corduroy when he arrived.
What I have heard... I keep hearing that bloomin' donkey laugh.
So he's clearly amusing himself.
Ah, ah...
The method actor within me is wanting me to channel
the greats of lip-syncing. I'm thinking Britney.
Yeah, got it. Got it. Nailed it.
Beyonce. HE MOUTHS
Shakira.
My hips are telling the truth here, aren't they?
No word of a lie!
That'll help me focus, I think.
Mr Carr, I challenge you to a duel!
Lips at dawn.
♪ Can't explain all the feelings that you're making me feel ♪
♪ My heart's in overdrive and you're behind the steering wheel ♪
♪ Touching you ♪
♪ Touching me ♪
♪ Touching you God, you're touching me ♪
♪ I believe in a thing called love ♪
♪ Just listen to the rhythm of my heart ♪
♪ There's a chance we could make it now ♪
♪ We'll be rocking till the sun goes down ♪
♪ I believe in a thing called love ♪
♪ Ooh, ooh ♪
♪ I want to kiss you every minute, every hour, every day
♪ You got me in a spin but everything is A-OK ♪
♪ Touching you ♪
♪ Touching me ♪
♪ Touching you God, you're touching me ♪
♪ I believe in a thing called love ♪
♪ Just listen to the rhythm of my heart ♪
♪ There's a chance we could make it now ♪
♪ We'll be rocking till the sun goes down ♪
♪ I believe in a thing called love ♪
♪ Ooh, ooh. ♪
Oh, wow!
What a transformation!
- I'm digging the catsuit. - Yeah?
You had lots of energy up there. Tell me, how did that feel?
It felt fabulous!
It felt fabulous.
It's weird what this does.
- I know. - It changes my eyes.
It kind of, in a really weird way, makes you, like, a little bit hot.
Or is that just me?
- All right, moving on. - OK!
- What did you think? - A couple of things.
We now have the same dentist, it appears.
I love the way you got the whole family involved.
You got your mum up there...
Your two teenage daughters did a fabulous job.
Huge. Huge performance. Huge.
Pro Green, did you go Gaga for Jimmy
or are you feeling the love for Alexander?
Well, it's a tough one to call.
Never have the stakes been higher.
Pro Green, everyone. Pro Green.
Now it all comes down to this.
Let's see who will be crowned Lip Sync Battle UK champion tonight.
Jimmy and Alexander, come over here. Come and join me.
Professor Green, the belt, please.
So we've heard what Pro Green thinks.
But audience, the only opinion that matters is yours.
All right? So...
is the winner Alexander?
That was really bloody loud.
Or is the winner Jimmy?
So, the winner and Lip Sync Battle UK champion is...
Alexander!
So, even though you had a lot of fun tonight,
are you a little bit devastated you didn't win?
No. I thought it was an amazing performance.
But I mean...
A man of his age doing that to his knees,
that is incredible work. Incredible.
- How do you feel holding the belt right now? - Incredible!
Up close, you see how beautiful it is!
Can't take you seriously with those teeth in!
- These are never coming out! They're glued in. - They are!
They were both incredible tonight.
Please put your hands together for Alexander and Jimmy.
That's all we've got time for tonight,
but we'll be back soon for our next Lip Sync Battle UK.
So until then, it's bye from me.
And goodbye from me.
Bye!
- Synced and corrected by chamallow - - www.addic7ed.com -